My Personal Blog : This is me.

I AM SO VERY BLESSED TO HAVE BEEN SPIRITUALLY LED TO FIND MY SOULMATE. GOD HAS A PLAN FOR ME AND FIRST AND FOREMOST, I HAVE THE UNIQUE OPPORTUNITY OF CARING FOR MY HUSBIAN - MY HERO- WHO SURVIVES THE COMPLICATIONS OF MS EACH AND EVERY DAY. I CAN ONLY BE WHO GOD PLANNED FOR ME TO BE AND I AM THANKFUL THAT HE CHOSE NEL TO BE MY SOULMATE.

THIS BLOG IS A MIXED UP JUMBLE OF LIFES DAILY THOUGHTS AND EXPRESSIONS. THERE ARE NO LESSONS, NO HEADLINES, NO SINGLE TOPICS. THIS IS JUST ME- EPRESSING LIFE AS I KNOW IT.

THIS PAGE IS ALSO A REQUIREMENT FOR MY DEGREE AT CLI. SO IF YOU ARE SO LED TO READ THIS WITH ME, I HOPE YOU ARE INSPIRED TO ENDULGE INYOUR OWN DAILY DIALOGUE. FOR FAITH ENHANCMENT, FOR SELF REFLECTION, AND FOR REFOCUSING. LIVING ONE DAY AT A TIME WITH A FOCUS ON GETTING CLOSER TO CHRIST. THIS IS ME.

AND IT BEGINS:

I THINK THERE IS ALOT OF INFORMATION OUT THERE ABOUT WHAT AND HOW TO DO EVERYTHING.

THE PROBLEM I SEE---IS THAT-- NO-ONE- TELLS YOU HOW TO FEEL..

SOMETIMES SELF EXPRESSION THROUGH WRITING, CAN ALLOW CLARITY AND UNDERSTANDING IN CERTAIN SITUATIONS.

SO THIS IS MY HONEST-OPEN--UNCENSORED-ATTEMPT AT FIGURING OUT WHAT I AM SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THIS AMAZING CALLING UPON MY HEART TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN A WORLD I NEVER FIT INTO.

I DON'T KNOW IF WRITING MY FEELINGS WILL HELP ANYONE, BUT IF IT DOES: PLEASE BE KIND AND LET ME KNOW. THANK YOU.. THIS IS ME.....

5/5/2015 Blog 1:

Everyone at some point in their life, asks themselves the question; What am I here for?

For me- I never entertained the thought of being anything but who God wanted me to be.

That in itself is a lifetime mission, I have found out.

Because, God reveals himself in times of need, in times of joy, and in nature, and through others we meet in situations along the way.. and most of all... In His Time...

Boy, I am really good at controlling things.. I manage a household, did homework with the kids, fixed the meals, paid the bills, held down a job, cleaned everyones clothing, etc.. ( sound familiar?)..

I am the queen bee of multi-tasking, and I do it well.

I can manage a small business, deligate responsibility, support those in need, and take each opportunity to do something good for someone.

But all of this ( in my own power) smells like burned rubber. I am so overtired and overwhelmed.

I do for this, go for that, fix this, replace that, cook this, clean that, AAAHHH! I drive myself crazy just thinking about everything I have to accomplish.

And in the not to far away-place in my mind- there is a nudge. A prompting and opportunity that I often forget.....I need to give my cares to God.

It is not about me.

It is not about the stuff I do.

It's not about having to get things done - It is about listening to why I am doing what I am doing.

And I am telling myself right now, That if it is not worth doing for the right reasons, and if it is not pleasing to God that I do the thing I have planned- then I need to scratech it off he to-do list.

God's love is gentle, kind, patient, and I cannot hear his voice while I am running around trying to do so many things all at once. It is a trick of the deceiver- to fill minds with things that are not making a path to heaven, so I can get stuck in the traffic of my mind.

Lord, Help me to see clearly- our path for me today. Let me only focus on what needs to be done, and what will glorify you . I give you my life and my mind and heart- to guide and help me to become who you created me to be. In your Love and Grace.. This is me...